"Love them, not for how they make us feel but for the freedom and confidence we share from letting go." ~ Anna Blake
Letting go of what holds you back helps every single thing in your sphere of influence. Sometimes even beyond that. Letting go is hard. But one day at a time. The older I get, the more I realise how much simply focusing on self-care, self-improvement and self-education creates a ripple effect that heals and nourishes the world around you.
Worrying about what might happen detracts from the present and the future. Fear of loss or illness, fear of losing control, fear of loneliness or getting hurt, or even of getting older, can bind not only us but those around us as well, stopping us from moving forward. Reminding yourself to be mindful, to be in the moment, and to remain authentic even if you are anxious or upset, can help. You can respect and express your worries and move through them, rather than remain stuck in a state.
Our human and equine family here at Wadi Farm could be regarded as a bunch of medically unfit misfits, from a certain point of view. For a start, half our equine herd have health challenges. Half? Oh yes...
Darrah has Inflammatory Airway Disease (IAD), plus immunological problems, and only 40% vision in her nearside eye.
Chipilly is a grade 4 roarer. (Partially paralysed larynx.)
Shelagh (Yeera) is a low level roarer. This particular condition presents it's own health challenges.
Roxby is over-calcified and at 22 years old, needs Willowbark every day in his feed for painful joints.
Carranya, at 28 years of age, has arthritis and requires Willowbark for the same reason.
Weary has major dental issues and needs very regular dental care as well as supplementary feed.
Weary and Twiggy are both anxious horses with trauma histories.
On top of this, my darling Tia the terrier x was kicked in the head as a two year old. She now has epilepsy and other special needs as a result. I have had my own hospital visits and Kevin has scoliosis. (Spinal curvature.) I could go on but reciting gets rather dull.
So yes. An infirm bunch indeed. Except that I don't share that point of view.
A horse is a horse. Like anything, you can care for it and love it too much, or more perhaps in an unhealthy way. You can do the same with people - children particularly. We could wrap our horses in cotton wool...or in safe, small, single paddocks, with rugs and feed and too many hugs. But horses NEED movement and space and forage and mates and social interaction and the ability to express all 160 + behaviours. What they don't need is a needy human. I can connect with our horses across a large paddock. I don't need them to follow me constantly, or touch me or share breath with me on a daily basis. I don't need them to need me. I need them to live as horses.
"A ship in harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are built for."~ John A. Shedd
This quote appeared in the 1920's but is so relevant to so many things in life. We shouldn't limit ourselves or our children or our animals because of our own fear, neediness or anxiety about their fragility, or our worry about what's 'out there'. Tears may seem a natural response, but don't hold illness, dis-ability or trauma in sadness. It's not about that. It's about letting go and powering forward. It's about living - quality, not quantity. We all have a place and gifts to impart, if we but allow it. Nature is an inclusive network, an interconnectedness of all things, and there are reasons for it all.
This is where the pirates come in. I read an observation along the lines of pirates being great because they are so inclusive. They have no concept of ableism (discrimination in favour of able-bodied people). They don’t care if you’re disabled "because as long as you can f*ck shit up they literally don’t f*cking care...oh, you have no leg? Here, have a peg leg. No hand? Well, guess we gotta put a hook on that, give those sons of bitches a surprise! Blind in one eye? Put an eyepatch on, no-one f*cking cares...go man the canons you glorious bastard!"
Horses don't care either. I know, I know...in the wild and in the herd, if there is a horse carrying a severe injury or impediment it's left behind. However we have also seen some very interesting cases of horses supporting one another in illness/injury, and we've seen 'differently abled' horses do amazing things. Darrah is all but half blind and has immunological problems. But she leads. Damn straight she leads. She leads and other horses listen. Darrah goes for swims, she gallops, she orders Clydesdales about...she's smarter than most of the herd. She's awesome. She's beautiful. She's differently abled, not disabled.
Chipilly can only inhale 50% of the air and thus the oxygen she needs to survive. She sounds like a freight train when she gallops...but that doesn't stop her. Galloping. It doesn't stop her expressing herself and living her life to the full.
We haven't cosseted our horses but rather kept them as healthy as we can and helped them to learn to help themselves. Herd raised, they have learned how to assess risk. Training is individual, largely positively reinforced, and they get to make choices. They spend large amounts of time just being horses. Not restricted and not forced into a state of learned helplessness or automatic responses. There are days when things have to be done, when it's down to what we want as well as what the horses want to do. But we conduct those days in a better way, these days. We've acknowledged our mistakes and moved on. We've continued to educate ourselves about the best ways to let the creatures we share our lives with live and 'be' to the full.
"A ship in harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are built for." Remember that. And don't overthink it. Humans panic and worry and miss out on present joy because of it. Flow through it. Try not to analyse it all too closely. You are here. You are alive. Everything else can be worked with, or worked through...seriously.
Live lighter. Live more kindly. Let go...and trust the process.
❤️
